conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Randomize
