The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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