She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
