if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
