what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
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