Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
