The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
