my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
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