I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
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