I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize