You're my little dorito
if i can run in heels then i can drive
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
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