Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Randomize
