: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
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