i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
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