I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
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