I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
