Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
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