He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize