How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
