How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
