Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
