i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize
