Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
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