I accidentally burped into my bong.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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