bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
