He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
Farmville is her only friend.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
