Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
