Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Randomize
