I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Randomize
