He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
