I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
