I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize
