Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Randomize
