She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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