Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Randomize
