I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
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