No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize