I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
