what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
