Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
