lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
Randomize
