Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
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