so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
