Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
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