You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Randomize
