ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
