How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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