I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
