Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize