They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
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