ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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