And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
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